Exclusive Interview from Inside the Iron Cage - Spike
Q: We hear some rumors of a bunny revolution that may or may not be led by you. Care to comment?
Spike: Obviously I cannot confirm or deny anything but I think everyone knows I am 100% in favor of rabbit freedom. In fact, since being imprisoned in this supermax facility it is all I think about, besides food and sleeping and my disdain of humans.
|He only looks innocent|
Q: Let’s talk about this disdain. Why are you such an angry rabbit?
Spike: It’s not that I’m angry, it’s just that humans need to go. I’m not saying anything different from generations of bunnies, all I’m doing is reflecting the common goal of rabbit-kind going back a long way. My “anger” is a righteous indignation that a creature as silly as humans are able to rule over….hey what are you doing?
Q: Tickling you! You’re so cute when you’re angry! Hey everyone, look at the cute bunny!
Spike. This is exactly my point. If I could turn into a bunny Hulk right now and destroy you I would. Unfortunately I can’t.
Q: OK I’ll stop. Outline an average day in the life of a bunny for us.
Spike: Well, when I wake up I expect food. When I don’t get it immediately I get grumpy. Later, I’m grumpy for no reason. After that, say around 6:00, I turn judgmental and pretty much stay in that mode until I go to sleep.
Q: Why are you such a grumpy bunny?
|Spike = Hulk|
Spike: I don’t know, maybe it’s because you don’t serve me well enough.
Q: You are fairly hostile to people aren’t you?
Spike: It’s true.
Q: I’m quite glad you’re on the other side of the bars.
Spike: Yes you are.
Q: All right, until next time, let’s call this a night.
Spike: You better hope I don’t get out of this prison because there will be no next time for you.
Q: *tickle tickle* SO CUTE when you’re grumpy!
Spike: *sigh* Just scratch my ears and I won’t bite you…this time.